We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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