Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
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