yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I'm at about main and main street
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
You can't just leave with hair like that
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
