We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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