There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
