a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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