i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
