I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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