My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
