How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
