You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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