At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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