We're like a lot better than the average bears
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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