Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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