porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Randomize
