Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I'm at about main and main street
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize