I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
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