You smell like stripper and shame
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
