have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
