Me too!
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
