"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
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