But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize