i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
