she was so not down for the gang bang
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
