so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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