I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
