last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
