Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
