if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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