then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
