Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
