If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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