She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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