You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
my being single is dangerous.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
