so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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