Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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