To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
