Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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