Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize