im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
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