They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize
