We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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