is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Randomize
