And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize