im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
