He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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