i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
