with your own penis?
one might say we're banned from that church
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Just pee around me
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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