remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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