wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
