there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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